Time has past

So much time has passed and so many crazy things have occurred. After 13 years of a relationship and 8 year of marriage my husband and I divorced. Looks crazy on the screen, but it doesn't feel odd saying it. The D-word, which leads to the single mom status. To go from girl friend- fiance- wife and then ex-wife is... just way too many titles to deal with lol.I sat down looking at this blog and I had about 6 posts up. All about my family and he and I. Even had a post about us re-newing our vows. Looking at them I felt so niaeve. I knew I wasn't happy but figured that was how life was supposed to be. In order for your children to be happy you had to suffer in some manner or be unhappy. Self sacrifice right? Tht wasn't the case or true. It came to a bitter close our marriage and had some very bad bumps in the road. I'd say honestly that I've dealt with it on some healthy and not so healthy levels. I look at my life so far and I'm happy. I'm not 100% happy because I have many goals that I would love to accomplish; but I'm happy. I walk through the door of my apt and I breathe easy. There is no hesitation, fear, resentment or plain unhappiness. Surely I cant put the blame all on my ex because there was a lot I could've done to make myself happy outside of him. After so many years of... well lets just say it took me a long time to find me. Finding Kefira.. I believe finding out who I am will be quite a journey. There are chapters to be written and lived. So far one snippet is me dating. Ive tried dating, which as I'm finding out isn't the easiest thing to do when you have 2 children. Ive had the pleasure of realizing many men feel like the divorced mom is the new well of vast untapped pussy. So suddenly you're no longer a person but an appendage to acquire. Its an interesting journey but like most things it annoys me and so I tend to avoid it at all costs. Well that is with the exception of one particular individual. He's someone I'll discuss later.